To Help Or Not To Help…What’s The Answer?

We were driving down the street on a Sunday when we saw an old man sitting on the sidewalk. His walking cane was upright, but he was on the ground with his knees bent and hands flat on the ground behind him to keep himself sitting up. We continued driving while looking at that old man through the car’s mirrors. Does the old man need help? Is he hurt? Is he getting up? Is this a trick?

There appeared to be nobody else nearby, so we decided to take a look. I jumped out of the car and walked over to the old man. He was an old Asian male with glasses and shoulder-length hair. He was still on the ground, just sitting there and not moving to get up or lay down. I asked him if he needed help. He didn’t quite answer the question, but said that he’s trying to get to a center nearby. I looked around. There isn’t a center in the direction he was pointing at.

A young man popped out of nowhere and said that the old man had fallen and is on the way to a center nearby. If we’re able to get a hold of the center, maybe someone from the center can pick up the old man, but the young man didn’t know where the center was either. We tried searching on a map for nearby centers with no luck.

A car drove by and yelled, “Did you guys call 911 yet?” and the old man yelled, “No, no, no!” while waving his arms in a disagreeing motion. The car drove away. The old man tried telling us the name of the center, so we continued searching on the map. The young man asked if we’ll help the man, then left us with the old man.

We finally found a center nearby in the opposite direction, so one of us stayed with the old man while the other drove to the center to look for help, or at least someone who knows the man. As I stood next to the old man while he continued sitting on the floor, I realized what a chilly day it was. It had just rained earlier this morning, but after the sun came out, I had taken off my jacket in the car. Luckily, the old man had a jacket on. I chatted with the old man while we waited. He’s 81, and was on his way to the center for a birthday celebration. The center that he goes to has events throughout the week, and someone was supposed to pick him up at his house today for the birthday party, but since they didn’t show up, he decided to walk over to the center himself. Apparently he’s been on his way since 9am – it was around 11:45am when we saw him on the floor.

More cars drove by, and a couple walking by looked at us too. After what seemed like a really long time (okay fine, it was only like 10 minutes), we learned that the doors to the center were locked. That makes sense – it’s a Sunday.

For the entire time I was standing with the old man, he was still sitting on the ground. Not only was he unable to help himself up, but I would not have been able to help him up either – nor did I feel like I should. I have been warned in the past to be extra cautious when helping strangers, especially the elderly. You never know if they have any unknown physical injuries, and if they get hurt for whatever reason, they (or their family) may even blame it on the physical contact you’ve had with them.

As much as I thought this was not the best idea, we decided to drive this old man home. We lifted him from the ground and he was finally able to stand up. He was tall. We got him buckled up in the passenger seat of our car, then asked him where his home is. He said it was just around the corner, next to the gas station. We drove in circles around the area and he did not seem to recognize where his house is. I asked him to show us his ID and typed his address in Google Maps. It was the apartment I had pointed at earlier that he did not recognize.

We drove him to the front and walked him to the apartment number on his ID. His apartment was on the second floor. One step after another, he slowly made it to the top. There was nobody home at the time, but he seemed to be in a safer place now.

The next day, we checked up on him at his apartment again. This time, his wife was home. The wife did not seem to know about what had happened the day before, so when the son showed up to deliver lunch, we made sure he was aware of his dad falling outside.


How would you have helped this old man?